Not Guilty

I have several people in my life who speak truth to me even when it is hard.  One of those people has asked me on more than one occasion, "How do you walk in forgiveness in this situation?"

Truthfully, not always often well.  Walking in forgiveness, choosing forgiveness is crazy hard.  Just because we say the words "I forgive you"  doesn't wave a magic wand over the situation and take away the hurt that may have been caused or even lasting consequences. When those hurts come back up or the consequences we have to walk in daily show up, how do we walk in forgiveness?

This isn't a how-to blog post.  It is more of  an "I'm still learning, what you got on how-to?" kind of post.

My Discipleship group study has challenged me to think hard about what I think walking in forgiveness looks like.  I'm re-learning what Grace looks like.  Grace that only comes from a Heavenly Father.

I signed a song a few years ago and I haven't heard it in a long time.  But, multiple times in the last 2 weeks it has come across my path.  One of those times was yesterday in the car by myself.  I had to acknowledge that God was trying to tell me something.  I got my Mandisa CD out and listened to Not Guilty a couple of times and let HIS message sink into my heart.

The challenge I was given and am wrestling through is this:  Grace.  Not the idea of Grace, but the giving and receiving of Grace.

A Holy God loved me and desired me so much that even while I was still sinful He chose me.  He willing sacrificed His Son to have a relationship with me.  Even when He knew just how bad I would screw up, even when He knew the wrong choices I would make and the filth I would walk in He still chose me.  Chose me to the point of death for His Son so that I could have eternal life with Him.  He paid my price.

I celebrate that Grace.  I sit in awe of the fact that He is Holy and He wants me. But how do I put that into practice with others?

 The song Not Guilty helped me see that He doesn't just see me that way.  The people who I need to walk in forgiveness with, that I need to extend Grace to.....He sees them the same way.  That is a little harder, at least for me.  When people hurt us we feel righteous in our anger and unforgiveness.  It is so hard to see them through the eyes of a loving Father who wants a right relationship with them as much as He wants with me.  But He does.

I'm not sure it is ever EASY to walk in forgiveness  BUT, when I use the cross as my lens, I can't help but acknowledge my own guilt and shame and see that for me to rejoice in the Grace given me I MUST know that it is available to the ones who have hurt me as well.  Grace and Forgiveness were not given to me because I deserved them or earned them.  God doesn't ask me to wait until I feel like someone has earned forgiveness.  He doesn't even ask me to wait until they ask for it.  He just tells me to walk in it, because He gave it to me.  It may or may not restore the relationship with those who have hurt me, but it WILL restore my relationship with Him.

 AH, and there it is. What my heart needs above all else.  A right relationship with my Savior.